CHILD IS THE FATHER OF MAN

After becoming a mother of two little girls – angels aged 6 and almost 2 years – I have realised that there is so much to learn from these little munchkins on a daily basis! Whether, it is the elder one who teaches me new ways of doing math (courtesy – the innovative ways of education these days) or a new art style (could you ever imagine painting with “salt”!) or the younger one’s curiosity to learn and explore new things – there’s a continuous learning!

It’s true that it is said that ‘Parents are the child’s first teachers’; but as William Wordsworth puts it – ‘Child is the father of the man’ – there is so much to learn from these noisy tiny tots who are completely oblivious to the fact that they are also nurturing us the same way (or may be better) – like we hope to foster them.

Kids, by nature, have the inner-desire to grow up soon and act like adults. It isn’t a surprise that they will gather all the teddies & dolls from their play-room and if they are lucky, they catch hold of their ever-indulgent grandparents – sit them all together; open a white-board and put on a fake bindi and specs – to start playing their favourite game –teacher-teacher!

For the benefit of all, in this article, I would like to list down a few important lessons which I have learnt from my ‘daughter-guru’ (quite a paradox). These are ‘lessons of life’ which most of us are already aware – but hardly ever follow:

1. Innocence – If kids are getting troubled with something which is outside their control (or may be too young to understand anything), they can be easily fooled and gradually pulled out of the situation. Cook up a story / fairy-tale around it and it stays with them, and before they know it – slowly they are taken away from the cause of trouble.

Similarly, FOOL YOURSELF in situation which is outside your ‘circle of influence’– hum that song of Aamir Khan starrer ‘All izz well…!’. It is not the situations, but our perception of the situations, that matter.

2. Carefree attitude – If you tell kids to play their favourite ‘hopscotch’ game out in the summer sun, they probably wouldn’t think twice before stepping out in the heat. Even, when there is a power-cut, they will be the last people in the house to crib about the air-conditioner not working. Reminds me of the ‘daag ache hai’ ad campaign – which made us realise their carefree nature and seeing worry (dirt) in a totally new way.

Similarly, DO NOT TO TAKE LIFE TOO SERIOUSLY. Be your happy-go-lucky self who is always very cheerful. “When life gives you a banana, tum usko cheel ke kha jaana”

3. Living in a cocoon – Kids love living in a small little world of their own – cocoon. They do not have an understanding about what’s happening around the world. They are happy and content in their own little family bubble.

Similarly, it’s always not so good to be social. There should be a good balance. We all should be having a good SOUNDING BOARD within our immediate family – whom we can share exact feelings or sentiments with. A sense of COMFORT that develops around it is precious.

4. No ego – If kids have to play, they will play with whichever friend is available at the park -- even if they would have fought badly with each other the last time they played. They don’t seem to have the word ‘ego’ in their dictionary. They don’t care whether they were the last ones to be invited to a zoom-call with all their other friends already on it. For them, it is the excitement of the call which is important, nothing else.

Similarly, FORGIVE & FORGET. We should not keep harping on old issues and waste time & effort. Dwelling on negative experiences will only keep those negative thoughts and feelings around. – CHUCK SULKING AND GET GOING.

5. Adaptable – If one fine day, kids are told not to step out in the park and remain inside, they will do so (like in the case of recent lockdown). They will start hunting for ways to entertain themselves (creating their own set of balcony / indoor games) to keep themselves occupied. Their capacity to adjust to a change in circumstances, particularly when the change is unexpected, is simply commendable.

Similarly, CATER TO THE MOOD OF THE MOMENT. Be flexible just like your flexi-payment plan. Just TAKE LIGHT and GO WITH THE FLOW.

6. Creatively engaged – If the kids’ hyper energies are channelized and put to some creative use, in all probabilities, they will forget their sorrows. Take the case of a family crammed-up in a car, going for a party, stuck in a traffic-jam midway. The moment you suggest an oral-game to keep them busy, they will stop complaining about the less space / time delay.

Similarly, DISCOVER YOUR STRESS-BUSTER. Pick up a hobby which refreshes you from time to time – say, online sketching classes. It distracts your mind from daily boring chores. Remember, there’s nothing like ‘lack of time or ‘what people might say’ – NO EXCUSES PLEASE.

7. Appreciate often – Kids get pleasure & pure joy in watching small things – they would often sit, pause and wonder about little happenings. Even the school teachers ensure that they celebrate small festivals – which helps build their exposure & hence their enthusiasm.

Similarly, THANK GOD FOR SMALL THINGS. We should recognise the full worth of our surroundings and COUNT OUR BLESSINGS. This is the true essence of happiness.

It is high-time we ‘Un-learn & Re-learn’ these traits from our kids. As we grow up, we lose the interest (and the intent) in following the above golden rules of a happy life. The sooner we realise this, the more content we’ll become.

And more than once, let’s allow them to say: “Mom, let me be your teacher!”